I don’t often blog my opinion or reflect at all on what’s going on in politics, church or otherwise but it occurred to me that this is just too big to dismiss.  I’ll be honest, it isn’t good for Christendom right now.  It seems like lately Christianity has been taking a pretty rough beating from evangelicals, apostates and politicians.  It’s so hard to watch everything happen and not be disappointed. 

In terms of Ted Haggard it’s really unfortunate but it’s characteristic of the reality of being in evangelical culture.  There’s no room for sin anywhere.  Evangelicals are not allowed to have issues whatever they are and it’s too bad.  Now that might sound like a weird statement but I’m not saying that being without sin is bad I’m just saying it’s impossible so we should stop pretending like it’s some achievable goal through our own abilities to control behaviour.  I grew up in a culture that didn’t allow for mistakes, it didn’t allow for mess and now that I’ve had a chance to be outside that bubble to see the way that many evangelicals treat each other and the enormous amount of pressure that is on them, I just want to break them free of it. 

In my own experience it happened with my dad and I.  My dad went through a period of time that I can only call rebellion.  Although the actions were sin I don’t think in anything my dad did he ever doubted God’s presence or doubted God’s love, what he was rebelling against was the role and behaviours the church required and expected of him.  Instead of recognizing my dad as being on a journey or having some hurts and hangups he needed to process and heal from, they couldn’t see past the sin in his life to the person underneath it.  I must admit that I didn’t make things better, I got caught up in reacting to the behaviour instead of trying to figure out the problem and it set my relationship with my dad back half a decade.  I won’t ever get those years back but I can honestly say that my dad is one of the most spiritually healthy people I know and I love him and respect him. 

I just wish it wouldn’t have taken rebellion for him to be able to articulate what was going on inside.  I wish I would have known then what I know now.  I don’t think Ted Haggard had any escape or any way at any point to voice his struggle.  There isn’t a place safe enough in the world for Ted to have voiced the deepest and darkest struggles of his life.  In some way this coming out is the healthiest thing for Ted.  It doesn’t make the behaviour right in any way but for the first time in Ted’s life he doesn’t have to hide or protect an image or fear for what may lay ahead if he were caught, it’s all out in the open, ironically where it should’ve been.  And who knows, maybe there would have been a way for him to sort through his sexuality to get healing for the hurts and proceed with a life that was both God honouring and real.

Ted is a people pleaser and said what needed to be said, behaved the way he was supposed to behave in order to receive the support and attention and acceptance from people he so desired.  My prayers are obviously with his wife and kids and church family as they have the task of processing this and living through all of this. 

In our churches we need to make a habit of killing the image culture.  There is no one in any church who is the perfect image of Christ.  There is no one in any church who isn’t struggling with something.  Let’s stop trying to bury our sin and get it out in the open, at least there it can be dealt with, people can be supported and true transformation can begin to take place.

God Bless,

James.